You can gain profound advice from girlfriends, I know I have! Until today, I don’t think I have consciously thought about how many different types of women have entered my life leaving me with lessons big and small. Young, vintage, bright, not-so-bright, rich in emotional wealth, poor in character, funny and sad, uppers and downers, visible and invisible, good hearts and real bitches. So many varieties of female connection.
My girlfriends share amazing advice with me. Do yours?
Think about it.
From the women in our families, to friends and ‘girlfriends,’ to women we work with and buy from or serve us in some capacity, by this stage in our lives, we could write books on feminine mystique.
We have many fantastic women in our lives. Some stay and some pass through, but I call all of them ‘keepers.’ These women, in some manner, enhance our lives. Through unique advice from girlfriends they leave their footprints. They have earned our stamps of approval or disapproval.
Amazing advice from girlfriends
After you read my musings on a few of my special ‘keepers,’ perhaps take the time to call special women in your life and tell them how appreciative and grateful you are for their friendship, their teachings, their positivity and optimism, their warmth and kindness of heart. Your call will brighten their day, I guarantee it.
I will share the stories of some very special women who have each left their footprint on my life. Their stories are important. And though they are strangers to you, their wisdom may enrich you, as it has done for me.
Now onto these awesome women. Each has a story, and none knew they were mentoring me.
Advice from my girlfriend about expectations
“Don’t expect anything from anyone, and you will never be disappointed,” was the advice from my girlfriend. My loving and kind hearted friend gifted this advice to me on a day I was having doubts.
The sentence, which I had never heard, rocked me into reality. I remember, I literally felt my body go into a state of what I can only describe as ‘luxurious tranquility.’ The phrase was harsh but her words hit me and I immediately got her matter-of-fact message.
An unfortunate truth is that family, friends, and others are going to disappoint you. Put everything into perspective before you have a meltdown. Weigh their situation and your expectations. Reality will kick in and you will know exactly how to handle the situation.
Advice from my girlfriend to “Delete”
“I am sick and tired of dealing with women who bore me or upset me so I added a new word to my vocabulary… DELETE.” These words were said to me by a dear friend during a phone call.
All I could envision was the delete key on my laptop as my finger hit DELETE.
“Why, that would take less than one second!” I thought to myself. I started laughing so hard. It was one of the best mentoring lessons.
Fashion advice from a French girlfriend
My girlfriend from France, Florence, and I were walking arm and arm down a street in Paris. She was wearing a pinstripe light grey suit and carrying a pink Kelly bag and wore pink high heels shoes. I was also dressed in grey, including my handbag and shoes! That is only one of the differences between American and French women.
She said to me nonchalantly as we walked: “American women always wear black shoes and a black bag with a black suit or grey shoes with a grey suit or white shoes with a white suit. Don’t do that anymore, Suzi. Treat your shoes and handbag as colorful additions.” A great lesson in French style, dear readers.
Silence from a girlfriend’s perspective
“I love the silence of the night,” wrote a friend, in the middle of the night, as we emailed back and forth. I was jetlagged from a flight from Europe; she obviously just enjoyed the night. To this day, I have never forgotten her profound words. Silence is an art. We live in the age of speed and nothing is more revitalizing than slowing your body and mind down; grounding yourself into silence. Truthfully, “I love the silence of the day, too.” It is a tonic. I learned to love the silence even more on my visit to the Serengeti.
The advice from a girlfriend about Gratitude
“Keep a journal and pencil next to your bed and each morning before starting your day, write down one, two or more reasons you are grateful,” said a saleswoman in the shoe department when she fitted me with new shoes. What a wonderful idea and what a wonderful way to start all of my days. Grateful people are happy people. Ungrateful people will never be happy. I spend time every day with my journal and a healthy dose of gratitude.
Three girlfriends from the South
After I saw Gone with the Wind, I wished I was a southern woman! Truth be told, I would love the name Scarlet. Too late. But, I am fortunate to have three Southern girlfriends, Emily, Norma Jean, and Janice. Two are from Virginia and one from South Carolina. All are old friendships.
Sometimes a listening ear is better than advice from girlfriends
I met Emily in Honolulu over 30 years ago, and we became fast girlfriends and are to this day. We spoke on the phone a few weeks ago. Emily and I are in sync. We are kindred spirits. When my late husband died, she is the girlfriend who tapped my shoulder at the funeral and whispered in my ear: “I am here to listen to you.” She is still here to listen to me, and I am here to listen to her. We are sisters. Dear reader, having a sincere friendship happens but seldom, so hang on to your nearest and dearest.
Gems of wisdom from a Southern Belle
I think I met Norma Jean in London at an International Real Estate Congress. My memory of our meeting isn’t perfect, but I do recall how much I was drawn to her. We became fast friends. She taught me how to be a Southern Belle. Pause don’t rush. Take your bath and soak. She taught me to how to get the best room in a hotel. And, in her southern voice she told me to demurely ask the check in clerk to show me the best room ‘first’ so that he did not have to ride up and down the elevator to get keys for other rooms until I found a room to my liking. It was great advice from my girlfriend and it works, sweet reader.
My soul sister from the South
I met Janice in Kankakee by the Sea in school! She now lives in South Carolina and we email almost daily! She was the most popular girl; the cheerleader, the Prom Queen and every Queen in between. Somehow she found my website, and every once in a while she would make a comment. I was shocked when I first saw her name in my comment box. One day I sat down and contacted her by email, and we have been emailing ever since! We sign our emails: Your soul sister from the South. Your soul sister from the North. And, she is my soul sister in many ways. We are small town girls and are Cancer Survivors. Both of us love nature. We are politically aligned and both love Israel even though she is Christian and I am Jewish. Our values are strong. We are in sync and SURVIVORS. Who would have thought! Dear reader; consider reuniting with a school classmate or old friend.
My fierce mentor, my mother
I owe a great deal of my lifestyle to my ultimate concierge, my husband, who opened the doors to the world… and to my most important mentor, my Mom!
My mother did everything with gusto. My mother had great values. She took great effort to achieve or obtain what she wanted with a fierce desire and the best part…she did it with glee. I am my mother’s daughter.
Women of the world are my mentors
Darlings, I am not embellishing this personal statement: I know women all over the world. I am so fortunate because they have enriched my life ten-fold.
Three stand out as sisters. They are long lasting friendships. My girlfriend Susan from Manhattan, my girlfriend, Cheryl originally from New Orleans but we became friends in Honolulu. She was my first girlfriend in the Islands- over forty years ago. And, my first best friend, Gail. We were six and seven when we met, and we are still best friends. These women are mentors, I am taken with everything about them. Not one characteristic stands out. All of their characteristics do. I am fortunate to have them in my life and I am, grateful.
Not a day goes by that I do not hear from a woman from somewhere in the world. How have I been so fortunate? I myself marvel at the expanse of my lifestyle. How did a small town girl from Kankakee by the Sea go on to lead this amazing life with women friends?
Embrace the gift of advice from girlfriends
The answer is, I am open to meeting women! I have always enjoyed meeting women of all types and all backgrounds. Women play an important role in enhancing my lifestyle. They have been and are role models in every sense; positive and negative. You know dear reader, you learn from negative relationships too.
Don’t be afraid to open yourself up to different types of women. Go out of your way to introduce yourself. Remember, women need women. And, women are looking for friendships especially after they retire, move, or become empty nesters. Just be selective before putting them into the ‘sister’ category.
So if you haven’t yet, take advice from your girlfriends and apply it to your life, like I have.
I “Delete” what does not make my heart sing. Have learned to love the silence of the day and the night. I think ‘French’ when I dress, and I don’t expect anything from anyone so I will never be disappointed. And, on and on.
As your friend I will leave you with one of my ‘daily do’s’:
Live your life with gusto.
Thank you to my friends and my mother who hears me in heaven: “You have been marvelous role models. I am so grateful. I am smiling.
What have you learned from the wise women in your life? I would so love to hear from you in the comments below!
Did you like this story? Subscribe to my newsletter and receive every new story right in your inbox!
CLICK HERE TO SUBSCRIBE